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NLP is now one of the most widely used communication tools. Well mastered, it can be very see “ too ” effective.

Introduction

Our perception of reality is very partial. It is limited by our senses which, in addition to being unable to capture everything, often distort reality. It is also limited by the fact that we can not have a direct knowledge of everything that exists. And, as if that was not enough, our brain has to function to select certain aspects of our experience and eliminate others. All of these things make our world map different from each other’s. Recognize this reality and use it is an incredible wealth.

NLP is the study of this phenomenon. Created in the early 1970s by American scientists, the term NLP is an acronym for Neuro-Linguistic Programming :

  • Programming : The word program refers to all our automatisms, be they cognitive, emotional or behavioral automatisms.
  • Neuro :  The word neuro refers to neurons, our central nervous system and our peripheral nervous system that are in control.
  • Linguistics : Language is a code, it allows us to communicate, it structures our thinking, it conveys our culture. According to NLP, what someone does, another person can do it (NLP assumption).

The principle

NLP puts the five senses back into communication channels. This is remembered by the acronym VAK :

  • Visual
 : Is called “visual” someone who favors the sense of sight to organize his experience and to communicate. He recovers his memories by the visual impression he has and he expresses himself with a vocabulary related to the vision. For example: to imagine, it is clear, to see, at first glance, obviously, visibly, clear, bright, to brighten, to illuminate, objective, perspective, to illustrate, picturesque, foggy, lucid, clairvoyant, cliché, illusion, mirage, horizon, watch…
  • Auditory : Someone qualified as auditory privileges auditory perceptions to organize and access their experience. Someone who prefers the ear canal will associate a phone number with a story for example. He uses a vocabulary of auditory register. For example: hearing, of course, listening, listening, deafening, echoing, bell-sounding, being in tune, playing the whole range, shouting, screaming, talking, saying, ringing wrong , true, listen, hear voices, do low masses, harmony, orchestrated, false note.
  • Kinesthetic : Kinesthetic are those who in general use their physical feelings (movements, postures, balances, olfactory, taste …) to organize their experience and access it. The privileged vocabulary then refers to these areas: feel, common sense, feet on the ground, warmth, warmth, coldness, heart on the hand, take to heart, contact, pretty chew, it smells scorched, heavy, light, shock, grasp, flair, feel, experience.

The field of consciousness

Our field of consciousness is limited to 7 +/- 2 mnemic items that is to say that we can process between 5 and 9 informations at the same time. Afterwards we automatically switch to “internal awareness” (internal visual, internal auditory). The external / internal communication cycle occurs on average every 45 seconds.

1. To know “classify” our interlocutor

It is essential to identify the dominant channel of its interlocutors in order to facilitate communication. This identification is all the more important during a training action where we want to optimize the assimilation of information. The observation of the behavior, the attitude and the gestures of the individuals makes it possible to inform us as for their sensory channels.

Typology of interlocutor

Visual

Auditory

kinesthetic

Relational

Is often physiognomists.

Recognize people at the voice.

Expresses feelings.

Sensitivity

With colors and shapes.

To sounds and words.

Ambiances.

Position

Stands straight, a little stiff head and shoulders raised.

Gestures directed upwards.

Casual, takes the position leaning head.

Very laid back. With a round back.

Voice

Acute, fast paced and jerky.

Voice well timbre, average pace.

Serious voice, slow pace with numbers breaks.

Eyes

Look at his interlocutor.

Do not look at his interlocutor.

Prefers closeness to the gaze.

Learning

Look, view, demonstrate.

Appreciates the verbal instructions.

Experiment, get involved.

Breathing

Superficial and fast.

Enough wide.

Deep and ample.

Studies

See the words written in his head, pictures; draws diagrams, heals layout, uses colors.

Uses sound support, reads aloud, puts emphasis on rhythm and accent, hums, recites.

Move, walk while studying, draw plans and diagrams, writing.

Reading

Like descriptions, visualize scenes.

Like dialogues, hums while reading.

Love the action, the movement, wriggle while reading.

Response to inactivity Fixed, nods, finds something to look at. Speak to each other, talk to others, mumble. wriggle, find a way to move, take care.
Communication Is calm, does not speak, much, does not like to listen. Like to listen and talk. Join the gesture to the word.
Emotions Fixed to mark his anger, radiates to mark his joy, his emotions are read on his face. expresses his emotions by the word, the sound the intonation, shouts of joy, as of anger.

Jump for joy, anger; manifest his emotions by gestures, his position; like to touch.

Another solution is to pass a personality questionnaire.

2. Synchronize with our contact

Synchronize our movements

If you make the same movements or if you take the same attitudes as your interlocutor, he will feel a sympathy and a growing agreement for you. Couples dancing is the most telling example of the synchronization of movements: same rhythm, same fluidity and gestures are “ corresponding ” more than “ imitating “. Synchronization does not assume a dominant position but rather an exchange. It is a non-verbal testimony of the acceptance of one by the other.

Synchronize our voice

Verbal synchronization is the same testimony of acceptance as the synchronization of movements. This agreement concerns as much the flow of speech, the strength of the voice and its height (rather serious or rather acute for example) that the formulas used. This ability to tune is very natural: children imitating their parents or young couples are two families of more than common examples. !

Synchronize our eyes

One person can have 9 eye positions, each with a different meaning (80% of right-handed reading and 50% of left-handed reading)) :

  • Visual builds : The person imagines, builds a new image.
  • Future : In general, the person is picturing some things imagined or already lived.
  • Visual remember : The person remembers a known image.
  • Auditive builds : the person composes, makes himself an auditory mental representation. She creates sequences of sounds, sound messages.
  • Auditive builds remembered : the person remembers auditory messages, sounds, sounds, expressions already heard.
  • Present : the person is in the moment, she is listening.
  • Kinesthetic : the person seeks to find sensations, thoughts related to movement.
  • Internal auditory or internal dialogue : the person speaks to himself.
  • Past : the person listens to his feelings

3.anchoring

An image, an odor, a gesture, a word can awaken memories, provoke emotions, feelings, reactions, behaviors. The initial stimulus (photo, smell, etc.) works as an anchor for the one who remembers, clinging to a specific place in his memory.

We all have anchors that provoke internal states (joy, sadness, motivation, conviction …). These are quasi-Pavlovian reactions to stimulation.

The anchoring in NLP, consists of using a code (image, sound, gesture, odor contact …) intended to arouse in the other an unconscious and automatic reaction that can be positive or negative. Whenever the stimulus (anchor) occurs, it generates the same reaction. Therefore, it can be a powerful means of mobilization in the interlocutor, internal resources intended to elicit appropriate reactions.

Source

R. Bandler, J. Grinder (1976) – Frogs into princes : Neuro Linguistic Programming

C. Cudicio (2003) – La PNL

A. Deluc, J. L. Muller, A. Pina, F. Vendeuvre (2008) – La PNL avec les mots de tous les jours

A. Cayrol, P. Barrere (2008) –  S’initier à la PNL

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